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21 votes
Accepted

Do thoughts work as an info-dump?

Absolutely, positively NOT. This will get you rejected by agents before they finish the first three pages. Sorry to be harsh, but I'm trying to help you sell something, and this is a deal killer. I ...
Amadeus's user avatar
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8 votes

Do thoughts work as an info-dump?

Your goal for the first chapter of your book is not to give your readers information. The goal is to give them investment Dorothy Jones Heydt once described the "eight deadly words" that ...
Arcanist Lupus's user avatar
6 votes

How to Write an Involuntary Secret Reveal

Blood may not "show", but it will wet their clothing and that will show, and any physical examination is likely to be either without the shirt, or the doctor or nurse will use a stethoscope ...
Amadeus's user avatar
  • 102k
4 votes

Do thoughts work as an info-dump?

Look at other books in your genre written for your target audience. How do they do this? What you write sounds like a YA adventure story. The most popular YA bestsellers today slowly reveal the ...
Ben's user avatar
  • 8,667
3 votes

Do thoughts work as an info-dump?

NOTHING works for an Info-Dump Info dumps just don't work, because good scenes need conflict, tension, and character decisions, and an info dump precludes those entirely. Fantastic Opportunity Even if ...
codeMonkey's user avatar
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2 votes

How to Write an Involuntary Secret Reveal

A limp, a grimace, etc. If your child is "able" to hide the pain, it could be an opportunity to develop one character a little (e.g. the nurse) who turns out to be the only one to notice it ...
komodosp's user avatar
  • 1,319
2 votes

How to Write an Involuntary Secret Reveal

The conventional, cliché mechanism in most movies is that the kids cannot hide either the pain or the blood from the injuries and that the worried nurse forces them to allow her to examine them. I'm ...
Ben's user avatar
  • 8,667
2 votes

Is it better to slowly introduce a character's looks rather than describing it all in one paragraph?

It's generally not nice to correct the reader after they've already formed a mental image of the character's looks. So, unless you're making an intentional point, describe everything you're going to ...
Divizna's user avatar
  • 3,403
2 votes

Creating a fictional town - working around real-world limitations for TV show script?

If I understand correctly, your story is set (and filmed) in the real world, but not in a specific location. That is, it takes place in a New England town, but not in, say, Plymouth, New Hampshire, ...
Ben's user avatar
  • 8,667
1 vote

Creating a fictional town - working around real-world limitations for TV show script?

Actually you can change real world geography and movies do it all the time. Many movies and TV shows film in the small towns around me. They do a handful of scenes in front of one building, then ...
Kate Gregory's user avatar
  • 3,897
1 vote

Show-don't-tell and limited 3rd person perspective

Show Don't Tell comes originally from the writing of live theater plays. The idea there is, as much as possible, do not have a character or narrator TELL the audience something you can SHOW the ...
Amadeus's user avatar
  • 102k
1 vote

Show-don't-tell and limited 3rd person perspective

If you want to show that your character wakes up the next morning instead of telling it you can show how he experiences it, e.g.: His mom held the ringing phone out to him, urging him to take it, but ...
Ben's user avatar
  • 8,667
1 vote
Accepted

Self-contained fictional narrative consisting of only about 150 words, and without conflict between the characters

In your story, one character is jealous of the other. Jealousy is an internal conflict: Someone wants something they don't have. Because of his jealousy, the character makes a disparaging remark, ...
Ben's user avatar
  • 8,667

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