All Questions
66 questions
0
votes
4
answers
1k
views
Does my title/opening paragraph grab your attention?
Saki's Sixth Finger
Saki gripped her extra finger as she peered down at the beach. The plane was reaching Phuket, finally. Watching the crystalline turquoise water and shiny white sand had ...
- 12.4k
4
votes
5
answers
401
views
Opening a story with a reference to what someone just said followed by a setting description
An example:
Naomi's words hung in the air as I gazed out of the hotel window. The
mountain lay quietly in the dark, like a calm, sleeping giant. A
cluster of city lights glittered beyond. In ...
- 12.4k
2
votes
5
answers
548
views
Hooking the reader by omitting a piece of information
I'm writing a short story. I decided to opening it in the following way:
We were in Y, doing Z when she mentioned X. I wasn't sure whether she had misheard X's name or had gotten the wrong place...(...
- 12.4k
1
vote
6
answers
2k
views
Does my story beginning hook the reader? (dialogue + narration)?
The following is the opening of a short story I'm writing:
Erin stared at Ruth, eyes narrowed. "There was
an earthquake last night?"
Ruth nodded. "Around 9p.m. The news says it
was a 4.3 ...
- 12.4k
3
votes
2
answers
9k
views
Opening paragraphs of a short story set in an aquarium
I'm writing a short story about a schoolgirl who is visiting an aquarium (this setting is connected with her past and with the conflict of the story).
Sophia found herself walking through a glass ...
- 12.4k
2
votes
1
answer
763
views
How well would this beginning sell the book to readers? Not necessarily for money [closed]
Disclaimer: English isn't my native language.
A while back, I posted this and this. I got... well, reviews. While not outright helpful (ie. indirect, which is the whole point of critiques, I guess) ...
- 743
2
votes
4
answers
17k
views
Is the opening of this story intriguing, "dark" and smooth? [closed]
Disclaimer: I'm not an Native English Speaker.
This is my fifth attempt of writing a short story (the previous ones are set in the same "universe" as this one).
I would like to know if the reader ...
- 12.4k
1
vote
2
answers
667
views
Will this opening and dialogue grab the reader's attention? And how can I improve it?
Disclaimer: I'm not an native English speaker
Here is the first part of a short novel I'm writing. For the description I wanted the reader to have an idea of the place first and then let him know ...
- 12.4k
1
vote
2
answers
450
views
How to improve/fix this short introductory paragraph and dialog?
These are the things that I want for this introductory paragraph:
Grab the reader's attention
Create a melancholic and dark atmosphere
Inside was dark with just enough light to see shapes, and ...
- 12.4k
1
vote
2
answers
908
views
Do these starting paragraphs make you want to keep reading? [closed]
OK, first, I'm not a native. So, what you do by instinct and a bit of research, I do by extensive research, including accents and dialog style.
I’m dead.
‘But you have a chance,’ I was told, ‘Then ...
- 743
3
votes
3
answers
655
views
Does this beginning hook the reader? [closed]
Guide lines Q no. 4:
This is supposed to be the opening part, but certainly not the whole of the first chapter or page for that matter... I'm not exactly sure anyone would take 30 seconds to read that,...
15
votes
7
answers
10k
views
Why is "It was a dark and stormy night.." not a good opening?
Also, why has it spawned an award for bad writing?
- 263
3
votes
3
answers
492
views
How to improve this introductory paragraph (to fit writing standards and grab the reader's attention)?
A clock is striking 4:00am at a
psychiatric clinic. The darkness, the
silence, and absence of people makes it
look like a morgue. A young mental
health professional is sitting in a
chair ...
- 12.4k
8
votes
4
answers
330
views
Critique: Intro/Prologue to my Novel-in-Progress
all. Please forgive me, for I'm afraid I'm a novice when it comes to writing fiction. I wanted to get the community's thoughts and recommendations for improving the below passage. I realize it ...
- 223
7
votes
4
answers
719
views
Does my first paragraph grab your attention?
I'm working on a new M/M romance novel about a guy who's trying out nudism and an experience nudist. Does my opening paragraph succeed in drawing in the readers attention and making them curious? Does ...
- 8,726
53
votes
10
answers
18k
views
How can I write an attention-grabbing first line?
So, the beginning of any story needs to capture the attention of the reader, so he continues and wants to find out what's happening.
A Confederacy of Dunces starts "A green hunting cap squeezed the ...
- 2,279