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Entering the park, a slight breeze rustles the leaves making them fall to the ground one by one. It was a small park with a jungly gym, a couple of tables and a few benches for people to sit in every corner and jogging tracks were all around the edges.

Then I saw two tall figures.


She can only see the face of character Nr 1, the other one is hooded. The wind eventually blew the hood away, revealing his face. She gets surprised to see who it is. I don’t know how to describe the scene: how they’re standing, her getting surprised etc

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    Welcome to Writing.SE! Just so you're aware, we can give you general advice on writing a scene like this, but we can't actually write the scene for you.
    – F1Krazy
    Commented Dec 3, 2020 at 15:56
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    Who's entering the park? The narrator or the breeze?
    – Mary
    Commented Dec 5, 2020 at 0:42

2 Answers 2

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Write a picture.

Sure it doesn't make much sense, but that's what you need to do. Write what you see in your head, and that will take care of the physical aspects. Mention that bush on the side of the path, the willow tree a bit away, and the bench the two strangers appeared by. Spend a bit more time on people than unimportant surroundings to keep the focus on the characters.

As for inner thoughts, you just need to write what you character is doing. If you have trouble with this, I would recommend trying to role play your characters. If you've ever LARPed, played D&D, done some sort of drama club or acting, or are part of a local the 501st group, you should be fine here.

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  • I don’t have problems with the inner thoughts. I just don’t know how to describe how they’re standing. Should character nr2 have his back against her, or should she see their side profile?
    – Meg
    Commented Dec 3, 2020 at 18:07
  • @Meg, well that depends on what they want. if they want to murder the MC, they should be facing them. If they are just strolling, the stance doesn't matter as much. If they're doing some kind of drug deal or shady business, they should be facing each other and trying to block the MCs view of whatever is happening. Commented Dec 3, 2020 at 18:27
  • Yeah I know that the two characters should be facing each other. But my problem is which viewpoint the MC should see them from. (Thanks for the help btw)
    – Meg
    Commented Dec 3, 2020 at 18:54
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    @Meg, then this starts falling into the 'what to write' category which is off topic. You write the small stuff and then come here for things like character development or formatting, not the little stuff. Commented Dec 3, 2020 at 19:12
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In addition to Ceramicmrno0b's answer, if you're not yet seeing the picture in your head, find a picture, then describe that.

  • Draw a quick sketch.
  • Act out the scene with your friends (or by yourself, if that works for you).
  • Watch a movie that contains a similar scene.
  • Use figurines or board game pieces or anything to set the scene and act it out.

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