I'm reading KM Weiland's Creating Character Arcs. In it, she lists:
Questions to Ask About the Thing the Character Wants and the Thing the Character Needs
How is the Lie holding your character back?
How is the Lie making your character unhappy or unfulfilled?
What Truth does your character Need to disprove the Lie?
How will he learn this Truth?
What does your character Want more than anything?
Weiland, K.M. Creating Character Arcs: The Masterful Author's Guide to Uniting Story Structure, Plot, and Character Development (Helping Writers Become Authors Book 7) (p. 37). PenForASword Publishing. Kindle Edition.
In my character's case I know she's a mother that wants to keep her family together by helping the husband expand his land and wealth, and she needs to accept that people need independence and her kids may choose their path regardless of her efforts.
Now, my problem is that I have no clue what is the lie is or how is it holding her back, before reading that I thought I would find out as I write, now I fear I might compromise the story because of missing a foundational piece of information about my character. How deeply should I understand my character before writing her?
Update: To further clarify my main character to the reader:
- She's 42
- She loves her husband deeply and he loves her back, but he's older than her (10 ~ 15 years).
- She has three children: one stepson, and two biological children (a son and a daughter).
- Her husband is self-made, and she was there from the beginning.
- In their backstory, she had a relationship with someone of her age, but that didn't manifest as conflict before the story proper.
- Want: her children to pursue futures of her choosing that will help advance the family legacy (but, think Eastern mothers in the US pushing for doctors and engineers).
- Need: to allow her children (and, to an extent, her husband) their free will and independence.