I am writing a persuasive argument in rebuttal of a specific document. I'm tired of the word "distortion," and this time I want to say it with a simile. Please help me find a good simile for this situation.

Context: the document I'm rebutting states

The court determined that Student B exhibited adverse educational impact because notwithstanding her passing grades, during her final year at School #1, her symptoms were sufficiently severe that she was unable to attend public high school at all and required homebound instruction.

The distortion is in the word "passing." Student B was actually earning all A's and B's. But the author of the document finds it expedient to call the grades "passing" because elsewhere in the document she argues that Student A did not experience a significant academic decline when he went from a 3.8 gpa to a 2.2. So she harps on the fact that although Student A's grades have been declining, he is still passing his courses... and therefore should be found ineligible for special education.

So, after quoting the specific passage from the court decision about the "A's and B's," I want to say

Calling such grades “passing” is like ...

and that's where I need a good simile.

  • Heya, requests to help with rephrasing are off-topic on Writers.SE, so I've closed this. You can see the links for more info. Consider asking in chat - people are often happy to help there :) – Standback Jan 14 '17 at 17:02

The thing to remember if using a simile here is that, while As and Bs are indeed good grades, they are not unprecedented. The danger is that the simile could stray into hyperbole, such as "like saying Mozart had a reasonable understanding of music."

I would recommend using a down-to-earth simile such as "like calling the Employee of the Month's job performance 'adequate'."


Simile - compare-to using "like" or "as" (kinda tired but I suppose this is a noun...)

  1. "Like Harvey Levin with a side-boob shot" Lets use your ex. as template....
  2. "Calling such grades passing is like calling a 'California Roll-though' a legal traffic maneuver."
  3. "Calling such grades passing is like calling Business Math legit."
  4. "Calling such grades passing is like calling is like calling a violent crime-scene a 'spot of blood here and there.'
  5. "Calling such grades passing is like calling Jimi Hendrix an average guitar player."
  6. "Calling such grades passing is like calling [Mr. X[ the best art teacher in the entire district." [Mr. X obviously sucks hard b@ll$$]
  7. "Calling such grades passing is like calling that mangled SUV out front [the one they use to scare us straight once a year - complete with blood and unwashed brain matter] "in good taste." ...and as I wind down...a touch of unverifiable abstract editorial...
  8. "Calling such grades passing is like calling Hemingway's writing technique anything more than "typing." (as contrast - try F. Scott Fitzgerald on for size).

Hope this....[j/k] ...confuses you ;) - Tap

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