TL;DR: The story should include the violence if it enhances the story, and makes sense, and the consequences should reflect the interaction of the characters and their personalities. Almost any consequence that changes the situation to one where the domestic violence comes to an end could be construed as a condemnation of the violence, but it should fit the story's mood. You shouldn't consider your works as reflections of your morality, at any rate, because the best fiction is often those that stray from societal norms, allowing readers to view and experience things that they wouldn't normally view or experience otherwise, and wouldn't normally do in their own life.
Bad and good are actually just societal constructs, so you're asking about writing a fictional work about someone that does something outside the societal norm. This is something that happens every day in real life, to various extents. People break laws or morals daily, things that would paint them as "bad" in someone else's eyes. For example, speeding by just a couple miles an hour, only tipping 14% tip instead of 15% tip at a restaurant, or having a burst of anger over something and hitting someone with virtually no provocation; often a matter of that person being the "straw that broke the camel's back", to borrow a tired expression.
While it doesn't make it right, it does make it real, and realism is often what people look for in a story; as authors, we should be suspending disbelief by using realism. Sometimes people get away with it, and many times they don't. As authors, though, we shouldn't consider our works extensions of what we condone or abhor. It is our privilege to entertain our readers, and that often involves appealing to the societal taboos, since most people consider themselves to be good, even when others may see them as evil.
There are few that would claim Hitler was a good person, but there are some that would. The fact that we had a war over the matter is proof of this; if everyone had seen him as evil, they would have dropped their weapons and handed him over without a fight. If he knew what he was doing was evil, he probably wouldn't have done it. Humans naturally seek approval, and approval is found by doing good things, so most humans naturally want to try and be good, but often fail do to the negative human emotions of ego, greed, envy, anger, and fear (as well as others I'm failing to mention).
Unless you're writing a documentary or biography, your works are those of fiction and fantasy, and if the motive fits the plot, you should assume that realism and truism should trump your own morality. Anyone reading a story that later goes out to perform an action in the story, using that story as justification for their actions, are morally bankrupt at best, and probably would have done so regardless of reading the story. No story I have ever written, or enjoyed, has ever contained strictly acts that I condone, and I would expect my readership to separate fantasy and reality (not that I am a published author, or any story I've ever written has been seen by more than one other person).
However, there are a few considerations regarding the content of your story. You should consider if the domestic violence even makes sense to include, because some people will automatically shut down and refuse to read the book beyond that very chapter. Perhaps they've been victims themselves, or have seen the results of such behavior, or, like yourself, condemn the behavior as immoral and will refuse to read on, even if the perpetrator is later forgiven or punished. The darker and/or more socially taboo the story, the more likely it is that more people will not read your book. You must consider your audience to determine how graphic the details should be (or if it should be included at all), how severe the consequences should be, and how soon they are realized.
Like you, I feel that provocation doesn't justify abuse, but the truth is, it does happen. Every human everywhere has a breaking point, many of which are at different thresholds. That threshold hovers somewhere between "an evil look" to "they're killing me," with the actual level somewhere in between. Very few people have the will to die for what they believe in, which is why we have a special word for them: martyrs. Once the breaking point is reached, one of two things will happen: fight, or flight.
If the wife provokes her husband daily, he will most likely eventually divorce her, leave with no explanation or note, harm her, or harm himself. This is the basis of our animal instincts, and they can be hard to repress. Justified or not, things do happen when our animal instincts kick in, no matter how civilized we are trained to be. Good people eventually do bad things, and bad things happen to good people. That's not what makes people good or bad. It's their tendencies to do things within societal norms that make them good.
Some ways that you could portray domestic violence in a negative view might include consequences like: the man, horrified by his own behavior, leaves suddenly, and never returns; begs for forgiveness but the wife wants a divorce or has him thrown in jail; has an epiphany, reconciles with his wife, and never lays a hand on her again; pushes her over the edge that she's been on for ages and attacks him back. The outcome of the abuse should reflect how you perceive the characters, with their personalities, would interact with the experience. No two interactions would be the same, so you'll have to draw on the knowledge of your characters and their personalities to determine the outcome.
The only unacceptable outcome from domestic violence is that the situation remains unchanged, or where the victim dies or is permanently disabled because of the event, and the aggressor faces no jail time, no physical retribution, no negative "karma", and no remorse. This one consequence would suggest that there is nothing wrong in such violence, but that doesn't necessarily mean that you condone it. Your works are not reflections of your beliefs, because if they were, you'd write about a perfect relationship with no arguments, perfectly behaved kids, no debt, a nice house, lots of money in the bank for retirement, etc. A story has to have challenges to overcome, and domestic violence is a challenge, and it should be resolved in a satisfactory manner to make for a complete story.